16 Jun Be The Divine Masculine Man
By Rev. Arvel Bird
Today is the annual remembrance of Father’s Day. A Father is always seen as a man in relation to his child or children. A man who is supposed to pass down or teach his sons what it’s like to be a man; a man who is supposed to give his daughters a sense of safety, love, and protection.
What we have had for the past few thousand years and today is a patriarchal, ego-based controlling energy that we call man or male energy. Generally speaking, this is the arrogant role model that is taught by Fathers to sons and is not even 1% of what the Divine Masculine is.
Today, I want to speak to the Divine Masculine and how this concept is changing how we view the role of Fathers and men in our evolving society. But women must also embrace their own Divine Masculine energy to come into full balance and power as a female.
So, what is meant by the phrase “Divine Masculine”? Masculine energy is an outward direction of energy. It is the kind of energy that moves from A to B, that rushes forward to a goal. It does this through logic! If the Feminine is right-brained, emotional, and creative, the Masculine is left brain; understanding through logic like a calculator. This is good because logic and reasoning are a tool needed to move through life, especially when it comes to planning and achieving something. The point is that on our planet, this masculine energy force has been disconnected from its true nature. The heart-mind connection has been severed resulting in a mind-driven society.
To awaken to the power of our higher Soul Consciousness we must bring all the energy we have stuck in our head, back into our hearts: in other words, as men, we have to reconnect to the Divine Feminine. Only in this way can the Divine Masculine energy flourish and express itself fully.
Our 3D lower mind sees everything through the lens of separation and judgment. That is why the Divine Masculine has not yet reached its full potential on planet Earth.
There’s not yet a large number of positive role models out there of the divine masculine. In fact, to come across a truly mature and integrated male is rather like stumbling upon a rare delicacy or mythical unicorn.
The unfortunate reality is that up until this point in our history, we have mostly been presented with the shadow side of the masculine. We have seen how bloodthirsty, arrogant, domineering, and destructive masculine energy can be. Most of us have lost our interest, and respect, for this fundamental aspect of existence.
The tragic truth is that most of the large-scale suffering in history has been instigated, inflicted, and/or carried out by men. Even the phrase “The Man” (which refers to governments/authorities) continues to inflict oppression and spread greed, prejudice, and corruption.
The crusades and witch hunts, two major world wars, genocides, tribal race wars, dictators, terrorist groups, fundamentalist religions/cults, and the mass rape and murder committed across the world … I could go on and on about the atrocities committed . . . largely by men. It’s no wonder that many people have a bad taste in their mouth and as such the Divine Masculine is being largely ignored.
A common misconception is that Divine Masculine is inherent only to the male population. However, all humanity has intrinsic Divine Masculine characteristics, such as logic, rationality, strength, and leadership. These aspects of human personality or behaviors are deemed masculine, and depending on their expression through an individual, they can be balanced or imbalanced. If someone is rational at the expense or lack of emotional maturity or is overpowering, overbearing, or ego-driven, then these are signs that the masculine energy is imbalanced.
Our greatest potential as humans is found in the balance of our internal Divine Masculine and Feminine energies. Equally inherent in both men and women. Our behaviors, thought-patterns, and tendencies dictate the balance of the complementing energies. Many times, self-imposed thoughts of inadequacy, self-loathing, or doubt tend to be the greatest perpetrator of imbalance in the masculine and feminine energies.
During my study and participation in the ManKind Project, I studied the 4 archetypes of masculine energy. They are the KING, the Lover, the Warrior, and the Magician. Each of these 4 archetypes also has an active shadow and a passive shadow.
For instance, the “mature” archetype of the KING is one who charts the course for his life, makes decisions and both receives and gives blessings to others. It’s a man who believes in himself and his abilities. He draws power from a Source beyond himself and knows he’s loved regardless of his outer accomplishments or faults.
However, the active shadow of the KING, is an inflated shadow of a Tyrant or Narcissist, who sees himself as “special”, with power being either self-generated or a birthright, entitled. And yet, he is plagued by low self-esteem.
The Passive shadow of the KING is a weakling who feels unloved and inferior to others. He has no personal power and is incapable of setting a direction for his life. He sees himself as unworthy or even worthless and becomes captive to the approval of others.
As individuals, most of us are caught in this pendulum swing between “too much” and “too little”. We are trying to find the perfect balance, but it seems hard and we end up frustrated. Our job is to recognize that these two polarities are different expressions of the same problem. The problem of imbalance. So by studying and become familiar with the traits of the mature aspect and shadow aspects in all four archetypes, I am learning to live as a more mature and balanced man.
The Divine Masculine represents a spiritual, psychological and archetypal ideal of masculine energy. It is the highest, most inspiring and truest expression of masculinity that is manifested through thoughts, actions, and beliefs.
A healthy representation of the Divine Masculine is witnessed through a person who is strong, but gentle. He has an appropriate action of guidance and leadership without the need for praise or ego-stroking. He turns away from greed and conflict and instead stays in a space of honor, honesty, and diplomacy. He is confident but not arrogant, and adventurous but not reckless. He is someone you may want to follow because you feel safe, supported and protected either physically, emotionally, or spiritually. Divine Masculine is also a mystic and sage that is constantly searching to improve, learn and expand himself.
The Divine Feminine is the manifestation of the purest form of feminine expression. Because of the patriarchal system that has developed throughout time, the Divine Feminine has been degraded, looked down upon and oppressed. But as time passes and human evolution marches forward, there has been a rekindling in the need for devotion and commitment to the Divine Feminine. A balance of both inherent energies will be necessary to continue progress. And now, all men and women alike are called to empower the Divine Feminine.
I recently had a healing session with Victoria Coulter in which I was opened up to experience Divine Feminine energy. During this experience I was engulfed in a wise, generous, kind and supportive love that represented the ultimate mother—a fertile, intuitive, patient, nurturing and healing energy that completely satisfied my wanting and needs for the love I never felt from my earthly mother.
I realized that it was my earth mother that had taken the power of a man away from me. But my power was restored. The truth is that no man will ever be complete without his Divine Feminine healed and in balance.
I have said many times in public that as a man among men my role is to serve the Goddess. I mean this sincerely.
A man, firm in his Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine energies, can build anything in this 3D world without competing with anyone because he is the creative force. He must embrace both energies in order to build empires for him and his Divine Feminine partner within. If his mind is rooted in competition and separation, he will not become whole within, and hence never reach the level of consciousness necessary to build his empire in 3D.
A man, embracing both of his divine energies, is so much more powerful than someone who is pushing through life with total unconsciousness. And yet, he never feels superior, he never gets back into competition mode. He is the creative force for his Divine Feminine partner within. There has to be balance within and balance on the outside. Whatever is to be created on the outside reality first has to be created within.
A competitive mind can build empires in 3D as well, but remember that this journey will be paved with suffering and pain for himself, his family and everyone involved. A man, rooted in competition, will never create but rather take away from others, hence making others suffer, and making himself suffer. Nothing will ever be enough. He thrives to have more and more. Notice that his desires are purely external factors, e.g. more money, more fame, more attention.
I recently was given a book called: “Never Again”…The true story of the James Ray sweat-lodge tragedy, by Shawna Bowen. I don’t know if I was given this book because I recently announced that we were holding a sweat-lodge ceremony at the end of the month, but the timing was perfect because there was a man that appeared to embody the Divine Masculine and as Shawn wrote, “people looked up to him and put him on a pedestal and gave their power over to him and he encouraged that, just like all cult leaders do. He wanted people to not think for themselves and let him do the thinking. This is an absolute red flag when it comes to a leader who lacks integrity and who is not safe to follow.”
Men who suppress their Divine Feminine energies are crippled in their ability to become whole and to truly live a life in abundance. They are chasing external factors, such as money, fame, cars, houses, watches, luxury, and so on. He has not learned (yet) to do the inner work, to get into his heart space and feel the unconditional love that he is.
Here’s a couple of examples of men who do model the Divine Masculine:
I recently listened to an interview of three female actors who star in a new movie called “Hidden Figures” about female mathematicians who helped get NASA astronauts into space but were kept essentially hidden because they were black women.
Janelle Monae, who plays Mary Jackson in the movie says, “It’s a story of hope. When we come together and realize that we are all the same that’s when we start changing the world. That’s when we are at our greatest.”
Octavia Spencer, who plays the role of Dorothy Vaughan in the movie talks about John Glen and his impact on the story and movie. She says, “John Glen represents the best of who we are as Americans. He set aside any personal differences he had and relied solely on the genius of these black women who were the number crunchers for NASA. He told these women who thought they didn’t even have a voice that they mattered. He told these black women that they mattered. He made a point to shake their hands. He made a point to look them in the eye and say you matter without regard to race or gender.”
That is a hallmark of the Divine Masculine Man.
One of my favorite actors, Will Smith, knew his wife, Jada Pinkett, was the woman for him the minute he laid eyes on her. They say their bond transcends mere marriage. Jada Pinkett says, “in order for me to redefine my role in the marriage as a life partnership it was necessary to find my own autonomy and finding the part of us that wanted to be together outside of the constraints of the traditional marriage because that wasn’t working for us.
She said she came to realize that their life together was based on Smith’s dream. She started exploring her own independence, Will felt abandoned at first. She says she stayed in the relationship because she never wanted to hurt the person she loved. She didn’t want to create instability and stayed because she didn’t know how to express herself. She didn’t know how to say what she wanted, what she needed, what she felt and how to make that request. In other words, she didn’t know how to use Compassionate Communication techniques that we teach here at CUL in order to make an effective change in her life that she wanted.
But once she was able to communicate that to Will they were able to change their life story and create a new love story. Will demonstrated a characteristic of Divine Masculine by his willingness to let go of traditional irrelevant marriage roles so Jada could grow and expand her life which led to a deeper relationship, deeper love, and respect for each other.
So, I’m offering 9 Ways to Awaken the Divine Masculine Within You . . . . if you’re ready!
1. Examine your wounds surrounding the Masculine
What has your experience been like with men? Have you had supportive male figures in your life (e.g. your father and/or brothers)? Have you experienced mostly abusive relationships/connections with men? Or have you experienced a little bit of both?
Examining your wounds will help you to examine any unconscious beliefs, biases, or prejudice you have towards men. These mental and emotional blockages are very revealing and will help you to develop and strengthen a healthy bond with your inner Divine Masculine.
2. Take responsibility
Look after yourself. Own your actions. Take responsibility for your happiness. Don’t permit yourself to become a victim who needs to be “rescued.” To awaken the Divine Masculine, you need to be accountable for your thoughts, feelings, and choices. Don’t blame other people when things go wrong; this is pointless and a waste of energy. Respect yourself, be mature, and reclaim your warrior energy.
3. Connect with your inner Father
The Father is a universal archetype that we all carry inside, regardless of whether we’re male or female. One powerful way of awakening your Divine Masculine is to connect with this inner Father and develop a relationship with it. Remember that your inner Father is kind and benevolent. In what ways can you father yourself better or be the father that you never really had?
4. Deconstruct your conditioning
As boys, we have been conditioned to believe what it means to be a man. We collectively and individually carry baggage when it comes to defining masculinity.
Once we have discovered what our culture has taught us about men, we will be more capable of consciously redefining what masculinity means. This will allow us to develop a healthy relationship with our inner divine masculine. We can start by asking, “what does mature and balanced masculinity look like to me?”
5. Find a masculine teacher/guide/figure you admire
Thankfully there are some wonderful examples of embodied Divine Masculine energy out there.
There are many teachers alive today who embody the Divine Masculine. There are also deceased teachers from the past who express masculine energy in a mature way. Just ensure that you don’t idealize or worship these figures–simply admire, respect, and learn from them. Ultimately, what is important is that you learn from these role models and embody and express your own inner Divine Masculine.
6. Connect with your inner Warrior
The inner Warrior is another face or expression of the Divine Masculine. But please don’t mistake what I’m saying for the way warriors are portrayed in modern times. The inner Warrior isn’t interested in dominating, killing others, or “fighting for peace.” The inner Warrior supports and protects you. He will defend your rights with calm assertiveness.
When you bring more of the Warrior energy into your life, you are awakening the Divine Masculine.
7. Be assertive and stick up for yourself
Being assertive isn’t about being angry or confrontational, nor is it about throwing yourself in another person’s face. To be assertive is to respect yourself and your needs. If you’re a quiet person or introvert, it’s likely that you struggle with assertiveness.
One of the best ways to start with being assertive is to use the principles of Compassionate Communication that we teach in our LIFE group. Facts, Feelings, Needs, and Request. You must define your needs. What need is not being met? Assertiveness requires courage, so it is important to take little steps. Above all, always remember that your needs and opinions are just as valid as anyone else’s.
8. Stand in a confident way
Body language has a powerful impact on how we feel (and vice versa).
Although it might be uncomfortable and foreign at first, improving your posture will help to send the unconscious signal that you are confident, calm, and secure in yourself. This is an amazingly simple way to get in touch with your Divine Masculine aspect.
9. Stop being passive, start being active
Be the instigator, initiator, and giver within your relationships (and life in general). Take the initiative to go out of your way to set goals, make plans, and work towards what you dream about. Don’t let passivity make you apathetic and lazy. Feed your inner fire and do something with it. . . today . . . Father’s Day!